A Very Emotional Hospital Visit

Today we went to the Hospital once again to see the Consultant regarding our Options with having a breech Baby regarding delivery and other things.

After getting called in to the Midwife for the usual routine test we saw a doctor who decided to send us for a scan so after examine me for just under 20 seconds telling me she wont examine me (yep that didn’t make sense to me either!) she just said: “yeah the head is defiantly not down there so Baby is still breech.”
She then started telling us that after the scan she will refer us to the breech clinic in the hospital where we can have a chat with a specialist about our 2 options: either we have a manual turning or we make a appointment for a scheduled C-Section in a few weeks time. Of course we urge all pregnant woman to do the manual (which in most cases does work) because we want them to have a natural birth experience.
I asked her if she has been done many natural breech births and she said yes but most of them in other countries here in the UK there are barely any expectant Mothers who choose this option because it can be very dangerous.

So after her little talk we went to wait to be called in for a Scan. At that point i just wanted to leave the hospital because i had enough, the last 4 weeks haven’t been fun at all, my emotions and moods been up and down and i guess because i have my heart set for another normal delivery (or water birth in my case) i felt like today was D-Day for Blob and me. I had Acupuncture last Monday and this Monday again and Mr. C. did the home treatment called Moxibustion in between every evening although i knew that there is no promise that it will work for everybody i desperately wanted it to work and was gutted when the Midwife told me Monday morning at my check up that Blob is still breech.

We got seen very quickly which did make my decision of escaping rather short lived thank god. Once we spotted Blob on the screen she just showed us where which part is right now and then she just said…and there is the back of his head and here you can see the spine….
Mr. C. done a jump and asked her: “can you show me again where is the head?”
And this time he followed her hand with the scanner and we both realised its down the head is DOWN!

I immediately thought stupid Doctor told us she couldn’t feel a head down there,…pffff!
And then the tears came not sure why, it might have been a mixture of relive and tiredness with me only having had 4 hours sleep last night due to another one of  Blobs kicking sessions.

After the Scan we, thank god! where seen by another Midwife and not the Doctor from before.
She noticed my teary face and asked me at least 3 times if i am ok and looked very concerned bless her.
She did mention that the baby could move around again but it was very unlikely due to its above average size and me being 36 weeks away from my due date. She did diagnose me with SPD (pelvic pain) which indicates the pelvic muscles starting to “expand” ready to prepare for the upcoming birth, guess i can live with any pain who will make this birth seem closer.

Once she told me i am now “signed off” from risk Pregnancy i immediately felt less emotional and more relaxed i had a lot of thoughts spinning around in my head how today and most of them where negative! Now that my spirits are lifted again and this cloud has shifted i probably should be thinking of getting this hospital bag packed.

Yes the normally very organised German me couldn’t even bring myself on putting stuff together and even though i have various bits as well as some empty bags lying on the bed in the spare room and walk past it at least once a day i never actually had the desire to start!

Wash machine is currently loaded up with baby clothes and the bed is getting filled up….more about that another day in a new post!

I also would like to thank a few certain people who have been there for me today even though it was only via text i would have felt lost without you! You know who you are!!!

Here is to “only” 4 more weeks of less stress, more sleep and a few more smiles and less mood swings from me (i hope) and hopefully we can welcome Blob very soon!

AK xx